Tether

I’m so busy lately that when I finally pull my head up from the bulging list of items I need to review with my manager, I realize I can barely remember the last time we saw each other.  By the time I get on his calendar, we have so much to cover that we bleed into overtime and I literally need to stay tuned for “part 2”, like the cliff hanger of an old soap opera, to be continued the following day.  But even though our business is unfinished, as I hang up the phone I am flooded with relief.  We have connected and I can breathe again.

Overachievers in the crowd, and those people pleasers who believe they need to go it alone to prove they are capable, can surely relate.  We know how to get the job done, yet we forget that when navigating uncharted waters, our proven and dependable methods don’t always work.  Left to our own devices, we can derail ourselves trying to boil the ocean, expanding our scope beyond the intended boundaries. We need a little guidance, someone to take the wheel for a few minutes and course correct, steering us to safety.  It doesn’t mean we’re weak or that we can’t get the job done.  The best leaders know when they need to allow themselves to be led.

Sometimes we forget these lifelines are out there and push ourselves to the limits of our resources, abilities, or endurance.  Sometimes we get so engulfed in the intensity of a new situation or relationship that we let ourselves get caught up trying to make things happen instead of letting them unfold. 

It’s not until my manager coos sweet nothings like “you should not be worried about this part of the work”; “I need to shield you from the politics, you’ve been shielding me” and “can I assist you with your presentation?”, that I’m tugged back into sanity, calmed and soothed by the salve of empathy, understanding and support he covers me in.

It’s amazing to me how some people in our lives just ground us in their very presence; how the sound of a voice or the squeeze of a hand is all it takes to feel reassured you’re on the right path, you’re where you belong. 

Don’t deny that voice that says “I feel like I need to connect to you again”. It takes some courage to admit that you may be a little lost or overwhelmed.  “Are we okay?” is nothing more than a gentle tug on your lifeline.  And there’s nothing better than finding out almost instantly that yes, we are.